abuse

The FBI finally changed its defintion of rape, and while that may seem small, it has the capacity to change things for the better by quite a lot for a majority of rape victims and survivors.

The sorrow from the loss of a woman like Jana and the prospect of losing other Janas is sobering to a strong woman. It is a stark reminder that there are some things that are simply out of any one woman’s control.

Navigating sex and sexual relationships after assault can be challenging: how do you deal with a relationship that seemed to facilitate healing at first, but now seems to be standing in the way, especially when the roof over your head seems to require it?

If and when we want to have sex in such a way where we only think of our own wants and needs, we can always have that easily with masturbation. But once more than one person is involved in sex, more than one person needs to be seen, heard and considered.

How do you tell a partner that you're not comfortable with something they want to do, whether you have sexual abuse in your history or not?  You tell them you're not comfortable with something they want to do.

How do you get out of an abusive situation and get yourself safe? By doing all you can to get sound help as soon as you can and to leave as safely as possible. It's so easy to feel stuck in abuse or other unsafe situations, but we can get unstuck.

Do you have to worry that simply by virtue of being a male person with a sexuality, you'll abuse someone?  No. Being a certain sex, having a certain gender or having a sexuality does not mean a person has any kind of innate predilection to abuse.

What's the difference between flirting and harassment?  How does a person recognize and deal with harassment? How do we make sure we're not harassing anyone unintentionally?

Whatever it turns out your sexuality and relationships are like, whatever it turns out you want from them, they're about much, much more than your abuse.

What is the value of a "sting" operation if the goal is just to "sting?" In a juvenile effort to harass Planned Parenthood, anti-choicers find themselves the focus of a possible FBI investigation.

Follow Jodi Jacobson on Twitter, @jljacobson